“Fear for the blood is fear for the flesh… and denial of the self

Fear of the past is rejection of the future… and denial of the present

Donnie Maddens, 2021

His name was Lonnie Dean Maddens. He was beaten as a child, and imprisoned at 21 for a drunken crash, which took the life of his 16 year old best friend. He was pinned in the vehicle, watching the life drain right before his very eyes. His time in prison was a large factor in his eventual paranoid schizophrenia. Locked in that cell, he began to see his friend’s face and hear his screams of agony. When he was released, he spiraled out of control.

Multiple children from different mothers. My sisters Dina, Genie, and Shonnie didn’t have much contact with me in my younger years. I take this as a sign of a broken family. This is further backed up by my mother’s history as well, which won’t be covered in this section.

  • Dina
  • Genie
  • Shonnie
  • Lucy
  • Bailey

Note that I was the only boy born from either of my parents. All my father ever wanted was a son. It was an unhealthy obsession that he made a reality when I was created, but it didn’t save him.

The Donnie Maddens Diaries’ latest chapter, “Father”

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